UK Diaries : Nov 22 - Nasty fight, Tears and Consequences
Friday 2:11 PM
Just had a huge fight with the team's manager and I shouted at him when I could not take it... yeah I did...cant believe tht...
But as it always happens, I cried. I cry when I am angry... I had to rush to the washroom after putting up a stern act in front of him...
Everyone here thinks I am the strongest... but today, they feel that I am the weakest coz I felt bad when the manager said all those nasty things. Yeah! I did put up a mast fight and finally he had to just give up and walk away.
BTW, is crying weak? I don't think so. It is just about the way you react to situations. When I shout at someone or if I am angry, you will always find me crying after it. That does not make you weak.
Crying never does make you weak. It means you acknowledge your emotions and you accept them. Whatever happens, you deal with it and you forget about it. As simple as that.
I am not justifying it but that's wat I feel... It is completely strong and humane to cry. At least, you are honest enuff to express urself, which is a brave thing to do.
I donno what perception people in office will have for me from now on. I heard one of them call me a softy :D.. .yeah right!! come and fight me.. u will get to know..I donno if this guy will gimme my leave or not.. but I have promised myself and told him that I will never work in his team ever... this is the biggest mistake I have done, I told him.
Yes. I am in a bad mood. :(
Sunday : 11:32 AM
I emailed my senior managers about the team manager's rude attitude and they want to discuss it. Now, I don't want to take away someone's job...so I will make sure that things dont get too far. My organization is very strict about respecting women employees and if someone does not abide by the policy, he/she is kicked out.
I don't know if I should tell my managers what he actually told me... or shud I just diplomatically handle the whole thing so that he does not get affected. Shit! I would have forgiven him and not sent an email... but he said things like "Kaun sa tumhaari shaadi ho rahi hain jo chutti dun??"... and then did the signature hahaha... huh! and he points his finger at us when he talks... he remarks on our personal plans and credibility.
What do I do? Tomorrow is going to be very stressful. This is my last week here and I am into this mess...NOW!! The whole excitement of going back home and stuff has died down coz I am so bothered by this incident.
I really pray that everything goes smooth and he does not lose his job. I will try my best to make sure that things are fine for him. :(
Theek hain...watever he said...he has a family too... What do you guys say?
18 comments:
he should be taught a lesson. whatsoever be the way. its good of you to give a concern for his job, but he wont be even repenting.
the managers are such breed!!
He should be taught a lesson or two. I've absolutely no sympathy for him (and his family too).
arrey...what are you doing? Aisey nahin handle karte...
There is a very thin line between - What you want and what you really want...
You actually wanted some vacation...and now where are you headed...turning all good memories into revenge...this is not the way...
In professional lives - we do not keep cleaning every dirty vessel we find...there are better opportunities to invest the thought process...
Now just tell what actually happened in the meeting and without any Mirch Masala - Your Manager actually needs to learn - "How to keep talking professional only?" so management should actually arrange for a training program ...that's it... and you might need to know, how to get vacation plans approved with professional touch...without sharing personal plans...
Simple... :) now cheer up...there are greater joys waiting for you
To err is human, to forgive is divine.
Let it go hon, its not the end of the world.
Have faith in God.
at the end of the day..u shudnt forget tht u r a professional..so complaining about him to authority may not be completely wrong..bt nw you cn drop a mail saying tht u need a personal hearing,in which you cn suggest tht if he seeks an apology,tht wud be fine.after all,he dint create circumstances for you to quit your job,he ws just being absurd.extract a sorry from him,which im sure he will never forget..and u go off ur way to India :)
see if he has change in his behavior . if he realise he was too rude n shouldnt have spoken tht way his behaviour wil change. if nt do go for action. aaj tere saath aisa kiya kal kisi aur k saath karega., murkh prani
Hey u did the right thing... these managers think they are the emperors of the world.... hell!!
I am too thinking of doing the same thing.... my manager is freaking me out these days... he screwed my appraisal...and now he is drilling me!! But I dont care.... :P
Do what your inner-voice says.
Stand for truth no matter cry or not.
Silence is also better if pardon is present. Rigidity is one of the reason for crying for a person but it doesnt applied for each person. Weakness is another reason but again it doesnt applied for each person.
Tats nice of u... :)
U've done the ryt thing.. As far as u know tat... dont worry.... :)
Cheers..!!
Arjun
Hirdu seems to know u very well :)
Anyways crying is never wrong at all. In fact its always better than keeping it inside, waiting till it bursts out.
I dont know whether you ll be asked to tell the whole story but be genuine enough and keep things in control.
As you raised it, you are the on who can pull it down :)
All the best Harshu..
sympathy hona ahhci baat hai, well you can try talking to him again, i guess but as you are furious that might go the other way :P
boy o boy, err i mean, girl o girl are you stuck..... mujhe pata nahi yarr, i am getting scared now, jo bhi hoga bata dena.... will be waiting.... ;)
take care and keep writing.......
today he has done this with you. tomorrow it would be some one else.may be you can just give a feedback that he needs some behavioural training or ettiquets sessions. do what your heart says. that is what matters:-)
haha! posted something similar...okay cut the haha...i know u r in bad mood.
oh my.. didnt knew it got so serious... hope everything has been sorted out... will be online... let me know if u need to talk :)
take care mate... cheers...
If he made really personal remarks, I would advise you to tell that to your senior managers! If he had made a remark on your work, then it's okay but making comments which are personal definitely isn't! And mind you, if you don't complain, he surely will! Don't feel pity for him in any sorta way, coz I did that mistake once when it came to my manager and that haraami actually went and complained his ass off about me !!
Be professional, don't let your emotions take you over... just go ahead and complain yaar! These are all work politics, and if you don't join in, sooner or later they will take advantage of this and they will turn you into a pushover. Fight back always like how you did with your manager!
And I don't think it's weak to cry. I am like you... I feel like crying after a fight, but yeah after a lotta fights I learned to control my emotions coz like you said the people at work will consider you as a sissy if you do!! :|
i think u shud say things as they are. Dont try to save him coz he has been nasty and now its ur turn!trust me nobody is so good in the corporate world. so teach him a lesson!!
Dhanya: Now I'm confused. Don't know what poor Harshita is going through. You do have some very good and true thoughts there.
As I told you...even i cry after i hv a fight...or anything...softy or not..that's how we are...so..what do we do about it? :)
complaining is alright as long as u are sure they wont be biased against u...
bosses ki bhi family hoti hai but u know they rule ur job so either u digest whatever they say and come back home or u give it back and then face the situation urself...
whenever i hv spoken up against my teachers or anything i have always suffered negatively..so i wud personally not ask u to take any further steps and simply avoid such conversations with such bastards :(
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